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My two favorite boys and one of their favorite places-in our backyard in the creek surrounded by water, mud, and critters. What a beautiful sight!

Will I know she is mine?

The boys and I got to spend the morning on Friday with a sweet friend and her new daughter from Ethiopia. Stacie and her husband returned about three weeks ago with Mercy, and she's (Mercy) been adjusting really well to all the changes in her life. I asked Stacie to tell me all about her first moments with Mercy and her time in Africa.



Stacie is a tender-hearted, spirited friend so it didn't surprise me when she teared up as she recalled meeting her daughter for the first time. Stacie said she knew Mercy was their daughter and it was like Mercy knew they were her parents. How can that be? How can a baby who has probably never even seen a person with light skin immediately feel so comfortable with these people? How does a mom look at a baby and know this is her child when the child has been living on the other side of the world and in circumstances so different from the mother's life?



These are the questions I think about as I wait for our referral.



I know Stacie pretty well. She and her sweet roommate at the time, Hope, lived across the hall from me and Tim when he was in graduate school. I can trust Stacie and when she told me about her time in Africa, I knew she was sharing about how God worked. Stacie's experience can only be explained through the power of God's almighty hand. God was preparing Mercy's heart to receive her new parents as He was growing a love in Stacie's heart for her new daughter.



I pray for the same kind of instant connection. Realistically, I know not all initial encounters between an adoptive parent and the child are like that. Yet, I know God can do things that cannot be explained, and I am trusting Him to grow our love for our daughter and her trust in us. I try not to imagine the initial meeting we will have with our daughter because I don't want to place too many expectations on it. But it's hard not to think about it. So, during this waiting time, I'm placing my faith in God to work it all out in His timing. I'm going to trust Him that when I meet my daughter, my heart will know she's who He picked for our family. If I don't sense it, I'm going to trust in God's timing and His ways to reveal it to me over time. Proverbs 16:33 says The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord. My confidence is in the truth that God is in control.

I am so thankful that God put Stacie back into my life after a few years of not being in contact with each other. I am hopeful that our daughters can be good friends and that we can support each other in raising them to be godly women.

Happy Easter

The Beach

My brother invited my family to join them for a week at the beach. We were thrilled to have the opportunity to spend a week with them, and the beach is one of our favorite places. Although the weather was a little chilly, the sun was out most days. The pool was heated, so all of the kids loved swimming. It was a great week. I am so blessed to have a brother that I love spending time with. He's funny, loving, and wise. I am so thankful for him. The great part is I love my sister-in-law just as much, and our boys love their cousins. getting all the kiddos together was not easy-

getting them to look at the camera at the same time and smile was impossible-

still a cute picture, I think

We did a lot of bike riding.

Isn't my neice so cute?!

Two Visits

Yesterday, we received an email from our adoption agency notifying us of a change in the Ethiopian adoption process. It will require us to make two trips to Ethiopia. Here's part of the email:

"Ethiopian Federal Court announced a change in the court policies today. This change requires both prospective adoptive parents to appear at court in person to testify to their desire and commitment to adopted their referred child(ren).

Beginning today, families need to be prepared to travel to Ethiopia approximately 4 - 8 weeks after receiving a referral in order to be present in Ethiopia for their appointed court date. Families will remain in Ethiopia for roughly 5 -7 days and will then return to the US. After officially passing court, families will then travel back to Ethiopia approximately 10 -12 weeks later to pick up their adopted child(ren)."

We have mixed emotions about this change. Part of what attracted us to Ethiopia was that it only required one trip when you went to pick up your child. Originally, you did not have to go there for the court date. We didn't want to have to leave our boys two times. Plus, this will add $6000 or more to the adoption expenses. The exciting yet really difficult part is that we will get to meet our little girl earlier than expected,. Yet, we will meet her and then have to say good-bye until we are back three months later to pick her up. My heart already hurts thinking about what that will be like.

I guess that's just the way things go sometimes with adoptions. We are not in control, and things can change quickly. It could be a lot worse and we are thankful that Ethiopia is still moving along fairly smoothly with adoptions.

This is another opportunity to trust God more with the timing of everything, with our finances, and with our emotions. We appreciate your prayers.

Off Roadin' with the Boys! (in Mommy's Truck)

Several of the Dads from church that take the kids camping decided to go to a local off-road park last Saturday. It was great fun for all, and it felt good to get out of the house after many days of cold.

Nice day for exercising the Discovery. As most people know, I have a higher than average love for cars and trucks. Life is too short to drive boring cars! With our new little girl coming this year, we needed a vehicle that could seat 3 car seats and handle our family adventures. After looking for nearly a year, I found this 2003 Model Land Rover Discovery with only 36k miles on it. It met our needs, the price was right, and the seller was motivated.

Jo's favorite feature is the winch built into the front bumper! If any of you get stuck in the mud or snow - give her a call.

Wesley was the official judge of which mud puddles were too deep. "Dat pud dul was too deep Daddy. . . too deep"

Snack Time - Mr. Brent has a neat folding picnic table. The crew stopped for a snack break at the top of a hill. We got several interesting looks as other drivers passed us. I don't think they had seen that many kids on the trail before.

Axle Articulation - Loaded with 4 Car Seats and 2 Dads, the Disco still soaked up the bumps with ease. With solid front and rear axles, a 2" suspension lift, a 9000lb winch, and rock sliders, the Disco is ready for the trail.

I don't think boys ever tire of getting muddy - it just looks a little different as we get older. I know Jo feels that way lately. The Franklin boys were voting to leave the truck muddy for a few days, but Jo made us clean it off on Sunday - bummer.

I wish my Dad were still here to go with us. I know he would have had a blast driving over the rocks, through the puddles, and up the hills while listening to the the kids giggling and asking to go again. Among many other things, he taught me that life is too short and to have fun. We are ready for the next trip . . . . .

This post is from Tim...

Fellowship...

One definition of fellowship reads, "A close association of friends or equals sharing similar interests."

An unexpected blessing from our adoption journey has been the encouragement and kinship we've experienced from others who are adopting or have adopted. We have been so blessed to be a part of the African Adoption Fellowship Group. From learning about hair care to travel adventures, it has been so insightful to be a part of that group each month.

We've been inspired by other families that we have known in the past that have adopted. They paved the road for us, set examples of faithfulness and perseverance, and gave us real-life examples of how adoption can make a difference in everyone involved. Those families pray for us, and it means so much.

We're encouraged by families that we are meeting now and getting to know who share our heart's desire to care for the orphan. We had dinner with a family on Friday night who is just a little ahead of us in the adoption process. Our hearts are being knit together by the love we share for a country on the other side of the world. We can talk with them about all of the questions and thoughts that bounce around inside our brains, and they understand and share those struggles and questions.

A group of sweet friends from my Mops group is now meeting monthly to pray for the fatherless and those seeking to help the children with no homes.

Families at my church that are involved with adoption are getting together for an Easter egg hunt in a few weeks.

An old neighbor that I had not talked to in over a year called a few weeks ago to tell me we are both going to have daughters from Ethiopia. Now, I have the joy of helping to plan a shower to celebrate her daughter and how God has blessed their family.

A friend of a friend emailed to ask questions about adoption....another new friendship begins.

I'm so thankful for all of these little blessings, for new relationships, for friends to travel this road with us, for sweet brown faces I see at church who remind me our daughter is waiting for us, for the prayers of others.

Sweet fellowship with families like ours makes this journey a little easier and a lot more fun.

Singing in the Bathtub

"Jesus loves me"...and the bathtub!

(Be sure to pause the music on the lefthand side so you can hear the boys singing.)

Snow Much Fun!

Our church started later today, so we were able to go out and enjoy the snow early today before anyone else was out. It was beautiful, peaceful, and not too cold. We enjoyed it even more today than yesterday. Graham's favorite thing was sledding down small hills while Wesley enjoyed pushing his truck around in the icy snow.

Tim took these photos. I thought they were artistic and creative. I also love the snow boots on Wesley. This pic will help me remember how cute he looked in them.

For those of you who asked...

Isn't it cute? I can't wait to see her in it.

Snow Day!

Snow came today and it's still falling tonight. My boys are having a hard time going to sleep because they are so excited about the snow. We'll be playing outside again tomorrow.
Our friends who live in our neighborhood and go to our church came over to play today since they were out of school and their mom needed to go to work. What fun we have together! Graham and Wesley just love it when they come over. I was excited to have them eat at our new kitchen table. It now can seat 6 people-so we have room for baby girl when she gets big enough to join us at the table. I told Tim we could really fit three kids on each bench, so technically we could have six kids someday. Ha! Only kidding.

Hope

I bought her a shirt today. I've tried to resist buying clothes for our daughter at this point because we don't know what age she will be when she comes home. Today, I couldn't resist. It was pink, it was cute, it had a bird on it, and it was a whopping $2.50. After I got home, I started to hang it in what will be her closet, and then I decided to hang it on the outside of the closet door...for all to see. Well, at least I can look at it often. It seems I, being a visual learner, need something to look at to remind me. I want to be reminded of the hope I felt today.

As it has this past month, my hope will wane at times. Yet, at other times, it will appear like the welcomed sunshine Wesley and I enjoyed today at the park. It will gently land on my heart as the beautiful cardinal outside of my window with it's breast all fluffed up to brace the winter's chill.

I have felt so encouraged after posting my last entry by my precious friends who have written me saying words like, "You are not alone", "I have felt the exact same way", and "I am praying for you". God knew what I needed to hear, and He has blessed me so much with friends who let me see their insecurities, their mess, and their fears.

Sometimes I think we can fall into the trap of thinking we have to have it all together. Everyone else does. We believe the lie that all the other moms know what they are doing and don't ever struggle with the feelings of doubt like we do. This week, I've been reminded that we are all in this crazy, broken world stumbling over each day just trying to do the best we can. Freedom exists when we let others see our flaws and our insecurities, and hope comes when we open ourselves up to others and are vulnerable enough to share our struggles.

I'm going to go look at the adorable shirt hanging on the closet door. I'm going to let myself feel excited knowing that there will be difficult days to come, life with three kids will not be easy, but I can do it because of God's wonderful and sufficient grace...and with a little help from my friends.

Sufficient

This last month has been rough, and I feel ragged. My two-year-old has stepped into his "terrible two's" complete with tantrums and melt-downs. He refuses to sit on the potty, answers a grumpy "no" to most questions, and has decided he hates baths. Mommy has wanted to have her own melt-downs.

And it's not just that...I have felt like this gray cloud has been following me every where I go. I, being a woman who doesn't cry that easily, has found myself several times on the verge of tears. I have felt overwhelmed and overburdened by the responsibility before me. At first, I thought it was the end of Christmas, the good-byes to loved ones who live too far away, and the cold weather that confines us to our house. Yet, we are back into our routine, the sunny has peaked out, the snow has melted, and I still feel "blah".

I think about our adoption, and again, I feel overwhelmed. The excitement I felt a few months ago has been replaced by anxiety and feelings of inadequacy. How can I do it? How can I mother three children when I feel so overwhelmed caring for two already?

I asked God these questions, and His reply, like so often times, was a gentle reassurance. He reminded me that His grace is sufficient for Today.

I woke up one morning to read this message in my devotional book, Jesus Lives, by Sarah Young:

My Grace is sufficient for you, but it's sufficiency is for one day at a time. That's why it is essential for you to learn how to live in the present. Your mind so easily slips into the future, where worries abound. You also spend way too much time analyzing the past. Meanwhile, splendors of the present moment parade before you, and you don't even notice. Part of the problem is your tendency to strive for self-sufficiency. I will help you learn to rest in My sufficiency, depending on Me more and more.

Be he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:9

Brrrrrrr!

It's cold here, but we can't stay inside forever. Despite the frigid temperatures, we went to the park on several sunny days last week. My dad and his wife were here for a few days, and they bravely faced the cold with us, too. Graham and Grandpa even played tennis one afternoon.

A Day Trip to Chattanooga

One day this week, we drove to Chattanooga for a little family time in a city we love. The boys loved the hands-on children's museum, eating ice cream, and walking on the bridge.

Christmas Snapshots

This year, we spent Christmas at our home and enjoyed lots of our family coming to see us. Perpy and the boys enjoying Ice sculptures-until our hands and feet got so cold that we couldn't stand it.

My mom and Sam with our family

My mom got a Wii for Christmas, and Graham had so much fun playing it with her.

Christmas Eve lunch

Nana, Graham, Will, and sweet Grace along with our friend, Hiroto

Nana and Graham made a gingerbread train

Her First Ornament

For some reason, everytime I see a bird, I think of our daugther. I don't know why. It started when I was decorating our newly remodeled our bathroom and found some bird things at store. I was just drawn to them, and they made me think of her. One was a print of a mother bird watching over her nest full of eggs. It just seemed fitting.

I have lots of ornaments on the tree representing different stages in our boys' lives. From an expecting parents ornament to lots of baby's first Christmas ornaments to handmade ornaments the boys have made, our tree is full of ornaments for our children. I knew I wanted to find an ornament for our daughter, and when I found a dainty, ceramic bird, I knew it was perfect for her first ornament. Graham helped me hang it on the tree, and I like to look at it often. It helps my heart to feel a little closer to hers. I can't wait to show it to her next year and to talk about it every year when we hang it on our tree.

I found some ceramic ornaments for the kids to paint and they helped me paint a bird for our baby girl. It's blue with glitter and on the back I wrote, "waiting for our baby girl".

We are waiting for you, sweet baby girl. Our hearts long for you to be with us next Christmas.

When Love came down to earth...

This Season, my heart has been overwhelmed with the humble manner in which our King came to redeem the world. I just keep feeling amazed that our Savior did not come with great fanfare and earthly glory but as a gently, helpless baby.
We sang this song in church on Sunday, and my heart was touched again. If only you could have heard it! What love has come to us! Merry Christmas!

When love came down to earth
And made His home with men,
The hopeless found a hope,
The sinner found a friend.
Not to the powerful,
But to the poor He came,
And humbled hearts
Were satisified in Him.

What joy, what peace has come to us!
What hope, what help, what love!

Traditions

Traditions...you gotta love them. They help connect our memories from year to year, create bonds among family and friends, and teach us about what is truly valuable.



I love the short-lived tradition my best friend, Christine, and I made over the Christmas breaks during our college years. We would get together and make ornaments. Some of them made of glass balls and dough still hang on my tree. As I show them to Graham and we talk about each one, I remember her sweet friendship and our precious times together.



I also have some ornaments hanging on my tree that my parents gave me when I was a child. We had the tradition of recieving a new ornament every year, and my mom passed along those ornaments to me when I became an adult. Seeing the little brass angel with its dangling bell or the white ceramic bear with the red bow bring up some tender memories of when I was a little girl.



I remember the tradition my brother created with me when we were little. Every Christmas morning long before anyone else was awake, he would sneak in my room and wake me up so we could go see the goodies waiting for us by the tree.



Tim and I are trying to create traditions with our children in hopes that someday they will look back and smile on the ways they celebrated Christmas as children. Some of them are simple and fun like making ornaments to give to family. Some of them will hopefully show love to others like baking treats to pass out to our neighbors. And some of them, the most treasured, will help to remind us of the truths of Christmas. They will center us around the manager and cause our hearts to adore the Savior.



I love the tradition of the Jesus birthday cake Tim and his sister had in their house growing up, so now we bake a cake for Jesus with our children every year. Another special tradition is the Jesse Advent tree. A few years ago, I got together with some ladies in my church to make ornament for the Jesse tree. The 25 ornaments represent different prophecies written about in the Old Testament that foresee the coming of the Christ. Every night, the boys are excited to find out which ornament we will hang on the little Jesse tree. They might not understand all of it now, but in years to come, I hope it will become an important tradition to them.



I would love to hear some of the traditions you had as a child or ones you are now creating as an adult.

Puppies!

Andrew's neighbors' dog had puppies, and he invited us over to play with them. They were adorable, and the kids loved it.